Letter to You

Dear Baby Tayn,

I can't begin to express the way that I feel about you already. I know it's not quite time for us to get to hold you and see your face, but I want you to know that we love you more than anything. We're ready as can be to step up into our new roles as your parents, being fully responsible and capable to do what is right and best for you, according to the Lord and His will. We will lean on His guidance and wisdom and continue to trust in Him. In fact, I've been talking with Him a lot lately while praying for you. I've been praying for your health and your development while still in the womb. I've been praying for your safety and protection. I've been praying for and speaking health and life into all of your bones, organs, limbs and every other structure that is developing and already developed. I've been praying over your room, the room where you'll spend a majority of your time in your first year of life. I've been praying for God to extend His grace to you and to whisper His words of love to you. I'll continue to pray for you and for our family all the days of my life!

In preparing for your arrival, we've both done a lot of work -- from getting your room all ready with your crib, changing table and other furniture, to things like educating ourselves on what it takes as parents to care for and protect you. We've actually learned a lot from our baby courses (which you can read about on this blog later in life when you're old enough). Of course we've both gone to all your doctor's appointments and done all those necessary steps. We've read and prayed so much already to help prepare us for the wonderful days of you in our life. We've also taken good care of you -- feeding you good food so you get all the vitamins and nutrients you need -- and love feeling you kick. Actually, you started out kicking, but lately you've progressed to twirling, sliding and maybe even threw in a few dance moves (must have gotten that from your mama)!

I tell people this all the time, but I'm NOT a crier. I just don't express myself that way emotionally I guess. But let me tell you, Baby Tayn, you definitely push me to the limit in that area. In fact, last night I was standing in your room, just looking around at all your new stuff and you definitely got the best of me. I couldn't help but pick up the baby doll in your crib that we bought for our baby classes and hold it in my arms, pretending it was you. So many emotions were gushing through my entire being as I got a mere glimpse and feeling, if only for a moment, of what it will be like to hold you for the first time. I wondered how much you'd weigh or if you'd look more like your mommy or daddy. I closed my eyes and tried to picture what your tiny little face would look like -- with your tiny little arms and legs and hands and feet! Since we chose to keep your gender a surprise to us and the world, I wondered if I'd be holding a little baby boy or girl in my hands. Even now as I'm writing this, I'm filled with that same unexplainable gushing of emotions running down and filling up my entire body. I even grabbed a burp cloth from your dresser and threw it over my shoulder while I placed the doll baby on my shoulder and pressed it against my chest. I loved the feeling of holding it and cannot wait until the day comes where it is no longer a toy doll from some local discount store, but it is a priceless and gracious gift from God!

I can't even turn on the radio without hearing some Christmas music that reminds me of you. Just the other day, I was driving and heard the words, "I'll be home for Christmas, you can count on me. Please have snow and mistletoe and presents under the tree." That will be you! Another day I heard, "Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas, this is all I'm asking for. I just want to see my baby, standing right outside my door. Oh I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know. Make my wish come true, baby all I want for Christmas is you." Is that not the almost perfect song for you, Baby Tayn? Soooo...maybe not the whole 'standing outside my door' part; you're more than welcome to just come in and nap in your crib! Then of course all the Christmas songs that talk about a baby being born, though many people forget that part of Christmas, reminds me of you and you being here and us celebrating our first Christmas together!

Baby Tayn, I know that your time is near and soon that day will be here {your pops knows how to bust a rhyme.....any time ;) }. I know it is not up to me, but I have a feeling you will take after your father and arrive early (if you take after your mother, you could wind up being a 2012 baby)! I think you'll grace us with your presence on November 28th at 10:27pm. I think you'll weigh in, though early, at 8lbs 9oz and be 21in long!

Let me take you back to your very own room. Your bright yellow walls with bright colors all around, from your toys to your bouncer, crib mattress and wall art. Your dresser fully stocked with an assortment of clothes, blankets, towels and so much more. Your bookshelf lined with books and toys of all shapes and sizes. Your glider, where you'll spend a lot of time in our arms as we comfort and feed you and keep you warm. Picture the place where you'll spend most of your first few days and months and years. How perfect and peaceful a place to be. The only thing missing now is you...

Love always,

Dad